October 25th. Day six . Cruel lie

When I entered Nabir’s office this morning, his usual “You’ll be freed today” was somehow more convincing than the other days. As usual, I thank him, show my happiness, but I do not believe him. Meantime I am strong enough for this.

Nabir offers me a cup of tea to take my pill, and while I am sitting there, enters Samir, the interpreter, a broad smile on his face.

-          Raymond, my best friend in Syria (sic) I am here to take you out! You leave today!

Finally I am not as strong as thought. There is still a minuscule rest of hope in me, just waiting to break loose.

-          Samir! Honestly? Is it true? Are you not lying?

-          No, my friend, you leave today. I will sit next to you, and I will not leave this room before both of us can go!

I am fighting my tears.

Finally I will be free!

Samir sits next to me. He offers me a mandarin.  We start chatting. He tells me that he read all my blog, that he was impressed about my achievements. Once more I hear the story, how sorry everybody is; that all this is just a terrific mistake. Now everything will be fine.

-          Why did my consul not come to visit me?

Samir hesitates one fraction of a second too long.

-          Maybe they sent him a fax telling that you will be freed next day.

Meantime one of the guardians came in, and gives some English documents to Samir to translate. He does so, then sits next to me again. After a while he says.

-          Wait here; I’ll go upstairs to check if the documents are ready.

He never came back.

Half an hour later a guardian brings me back to my cell, locks it up.

The bastard! He never came to take me out. He was here only to translate these documents! They got me once again!

This time it really hurts. I want to howl my fury, I want to cry.

-          I defend myself to cry before the doors of this prison are shut behind me!

This was the worst so far, but I do not cry.

-          You will not get me! I am stronger than you. I will leave this prison stronger then I entered it!

I am getting sick.

The cold is in me.

Meantime I wear all my clothes even during daytime.

This low blow from Samir will not make things better.

Today I walked 14 kilometres

I will survive, but it is hard

You can destroy a man without touching him